Period Party.

The older I get the more I appreciate my parents. Quirks and all. You don’t realize how hard it is to be a parent till you become one and sometimes they just miss the mark. For instance when my Dad wanted to invite my new friends to celebrate me finally getting my period.

So when I was 13 I switched schools from a small all girl school to regular jr. high and was secretly dying to get my period. I equated having a period to be a ‘real’ teenager/woman. I couldn’t wait to ‘bitch’ to friends about my cramps and say things like, “Sorry… I’m totally PMSing.” Plus I was on the later side of getting it, all my cooler friends had their periods & I felt like I was missing out.

So when it finally happened imagine my disappointment when I instantly didn’t become the coolest girl in school. In fact it happened at Skate Town USA (already not that cool) and I was unprepared so we had to leave & go to my friends grandparents house and I’m pretty sure they gave me an adult diaper.

This is obviously not what I envisioned. I had romanticized me asking some popular girl for a tampon as we rolled our eyes and talked about how periods suck. Not leaving a roller skate park to bum a diaper off a confused grandmother.

Also, I lived with my dad at the time and I had to tell him because he needed to get me some actual supplies. His response was, “Wow. Great. Should we have a party? You could invite your new friends.” He wasn’t joking. He wanted a Period Party. As if everything I had experienced was not humiliating enough, I now had to convince my dad not to have a “Period Party” and to please for the love of everything holy do not talk/invite/announce my menstrual cycle to really anyone.

I’m still not sure if this was a confused sincere Dad moment or he was trying to murder me through embarrassment. Either way this is my PSA to ladies and gents who have weird dads: it gets better(ish). Everything feels magnified when your a teenager but you will get through it and at the very least you will have some funny stories & at the very, very least: you’ll never be a basic bitch with nothing to talk about.

I should note that I love my dad very much and he has taught me the importance of acceptance and fighting for what you believe in and for that I will be forever grateful, even if one of those things I ended up fighting for was the right to not have a period party.


Funny | Parenting | Teenage Nightmares


9 thoughts on “Period Party.”

  1. Oh my gosh! This is too funny! The innocence of your poor father haha!
    We used to wish for periods and now we hate them! Guess that’s how it works !

  2. The period (…) time for any girl is just &%^$#@!! I remember mine my parents bought my a golden necklace which made me more confused than anything. Why celebrate blood with gold…? still trying to figure that one

    1. Ha!!! I just laughed reallly hard at that. In words of Will Smith, “Sometimes parents just don’t understand.”

  3. I didn’t have a party nor did I need one. I do however remember The Cosby Show and Rudy getting hers and her mom took her out for the day. I didnt really blow it up with my girls… I just think its another day. I would rat her celebrate bigger things.

  4. Ha ha, that was too funny of your sincere loving dad! A really unique thought! And starting of with adult diapers, it was an adventure for you, I must say;)

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