Focus on what you focus on.

I just spent a week in St. John visiting my Dad. My dad lives a pretty simple life: he only gets PBS on TV, has a composting toilet, outdoor shower with no hot water, and an oven that he used for the first time when we got there.

His house is simple but it’s beautiful. It’s surrounded by nature, different kinds of animals and it’s a short drive to the most beautiful beaches on the planet.

I hadn’t realized how different my life was until I was there. When I’m home I get so swept up in my day-to-day life/routine that I didn’t realize that I developed some not-so-great habits. Such as: constantly checking Facebook, Twitter & Instagram, counting the clock till the kids go to bed so I could watch bad TV, and getting an endless onslaught of bad news from basically anywhere and everywhere.

There was a need for a change.

I had this epiphany on the flight home. I realized how much calmer and more connected I was when I wasn’t so tuned into the news, TV and social media. That said, the first thing I did upon returning was watch Summer House, a spin off of Vanderpump Rules…JESUS TAKE THE WHEEL (& the remote).

This epiphany was obviously still a work-in-progress.

So I know I need to pay attention to what I’m paying attention to. I’m not talking about sticking my head in the sand and not taking action about the massive injustices that are happening in the country but I want to limit my REACTION and focus on my ACTION. There is so much sadness in the news right now that it will eat you up. It overwhelms me everyday, so much so that I then take no action. There is no real traction, only DIStraction and it’s not doing anything for anyone. As the great Jen Sincero said “Wallowing in the pain and suffering isn’t going to help anyone, yourself included, anymore then you starving yourself will feed the hungry.”

So I’ve decided for a WEEK: no Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Bad TV, or reading the bad/scary news. I will check my email, and try to go to websites that focus on positive new stories (example:

I will focus on my ACTION instead of my reaction and hopefully become a more balanced/happier person.

I also know myself and this is not sustainable for a lifetime but I’ll be interested to see how a week goes. See what positives changes occur and see if I can make a modified version that I can actually apply. I have found that when you stop doing something, detox for a bit, it can give you clarity about what’s working and what isn’t. Sort of like dieting, finding small changes that you do everyday (like switching how you take your coffee) can have a big impact.

Also, I know quitting Facebook & Bravo for a week isn’t exactly the most enlightened and spiritual thing in the world. I talked to a guy in St. John who went on a Buddhist retreat where you don’t speak for 6 weeks. Six weeks of silence. Just thinking about it gives me diarrhea. And then I would have no one to talk about my impending diarrhea. It’s sounds exhausting and I need to find my inner peace at my on pace, thank you very much.

So as a believer in the saying “Nothing changes if nothing changes.” I know I will either come out of this mini-detox a calmer, more focused mom and person or I’ll just go a bit deeper into my own madness. Either way: I’m excited for a change.


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